Start to value yourself and your life will change. Quit self-sabotage and get your life back. You are worthy and you deserve for all best. But first, you have to learn how to start valuing yourself more.
✦ Value yourself and forgive yourself ✦
Perfection doesn’t exist.
This planet has never seen perfect people. Every person made mistakes, did something embarrassing or made a wrong decision. Start to value yourself from forgiveness. Just let go of negative thoughts. No matter what you did is a past. You can’t change it. Now, you are a different person.
Your value is not dependent on your previous mistakes.
The most important is the present and the future. Overthinking drags you down only. It keeps you from growing. It takes you away from self-love. And it blocks you from acting.
What can you do?
➤ Write down all mistakes on paper and burn this page. It will be a symbol of letting the past go.
➤ Focus on being present. Only you decide about your thoughts. When you start overthinking and blaming yourself again, try to replace these toxic minds with things that will get you busy. Read a book, meditate. Chose what resonates with you. Do your best to throw away negative thoughts.
➤ Remember that it is not an easy and smooth process. Handling the past could be tougher than you think. Do not be afraid to ask professionals for help. Therapy is a good investment.
✦ Best way to start valuing yourself more? Stop comparing yourself to others! ✦
Comparing yourself to others is one of the most toxic habits.
You can’t start to value yourself if you don’t cut it. The Social Media Era shows you perfect lives, bodies or careers. And when you watch these fabulous Insta Stories from expensive travels or cosmetic surgeries, is possible that you feel overwhelmed.
Nowadays people prefer to share only great moments. Some of them act like they living the best life, whenever it is not real. Face apps, filters, staged situations. It is happening, but you can’t see it. It is just marketing and the business. People designed this mechanism to addict you by watching perfection. And, if it is only entertainment for you, it is nothing wrong. But comparing your real life to Insta Life doesn’t have any sense.
What can you do?
➤ First of all, be aware of marketing tricks and retouch. You can easily find proofs that your favourite celebrities photoshopped pictures. And let’s be clear. Retouching is a fabulous tool. It makes photography flawless and easier. But it is only a beautiful illusion. Remember this.
➤ Every person has ups and downs in their life. Also, every one of us has our own path. Do you meet a friend who has an incredible career, but you don’t? It doesn’t matter what she did. You and she are two separate people. Is nothing wrong that you didn’t have a dream job or business yet. Rather than thinking about her achievements and comparing your life, focus your mind on your goals. Life is not a race. Do your best, whenever you want and whenever you will be ready. It is NEVER too late to do anything.
➤ Do you want to start to value yourself more? Unfollow people who make you feel not enough. Stop meeting people who are triggering you. Use this time for building strong self-esteem. It will pay you off for sure!
➤ Follow people who inspire you and support you.
✦ Surround yourself only supportive people ✦
Or be lonely. There is no third option here.
If people around you make you feel sad, unvalued or depressed, be courageous and leave them. Being alone is better rather than giving energy and time to people who do not support you. Your environment strongly influences you. Do not allow anybody to treat you poorly. If they don’t respect you, you should quit as soon as possible.
What can you do?
➤ If people treat you bad, tell them that you don’t agree. In the beginning, it will be extremely difficult, but it is worth it! They might be surprising or even angry. Be strong enough to keep it.
➤ If you can cut contact with people who drag you down – do it. Do not hesitate, it is a step to start to value yourself. For the moment you will be alone, but for sure you will find new amazing people.
➤ Partner, the boss and even kids or parents can be toxic. Change what you can change. Even small wins will give you the energy to work on your self-esteem. Remember that you are the most important person in your life.
✦ Let it go the social schemes ✦
One of the reasons you unvalued yourself has depend on norms and schemes. No matter where you were born and raised and where you live now. Societies always had some destructive schemes. Or norms that do not fit your desires, plans or goals.
For instance,
you have a dream life, you travel, and enjoy every day. Schemes are different. You shouldn’t feel enough because you don’t have a family and own home with garden and dog! People ’should’ focus on family and work at first! This example is a typical, society expectation. The best way to start to value yourself is to be above toxic expectations.
*if you have a family and dog, it is ok 😉 It is just an example and is not to insult anyone.
The highest level of self-worth is to live by your own rules.
You have to (seriously, you don’t have a choice) always making own decisions. By your own thoughts and desires. This is your life and only you know how it should look like. Only this way will allow you to be happy and start to value yourself.
What can you do?
➤ Your life depends on you, and nobody can’t control you!
➤ Ask advice only people who were where you want to be.
➤ Follow your inner voice rather than other people opinion. Trust yourself more.
➤ Regardless of how great and satisfying your friend’s business is, you don’t have to start your own business too if you feel comfortable working in your full-time job. It is ok to do what really makes you happy without any guilt.
➤ Social pressure is something extremely strong and evil. You have to build strong beliefs systems, self-confidence and your own rules. It is your protection from ridiculous social expectations. You have to improve your braveness.
✦ Surround yourself with the right content ✦
When you start learning a new language, the teachers recommend one thing. Surround yourself with this new language. Even when you are not able to speak yet and fully understand. Watching movies, listening to music or reading books in a foreign langue allows you to improve new skills.
If you surround your mind with TED talks, motivational podcasts or self-improvement books will be the same result! Start giving your brain a nourishing 'diet’. Is exactly the same as healthy eating. ’You are what you eat.’ Quit negative and depressive media. Just unsubscribe them and you will find a lot of space in your head.
✦ Give yourself evidence ✦
No matter how is your current situation and where you are now. For sure, you did many fantastic things in your life! So how to start to value yourself more? Just make a list! Write down all your achievements and successes. Even small! Add to this list also tough situations you survived. You will be surprised how many things you have on this list.
This is proof that you can do what you want. And you are a valuable, strong, unstoppable and amazing person with a big heart.
Check the previous articles:
➤ ‘HOW TO CREATE A LUXURIOUS EVERYDAY LIFE‘
➤ ‘7 STYLE SECRETS OF WELL-DRESSED PEOPLE’
More inspiration you will find on
✦ @style.ofboss ✦
Instagram profile!
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